I Lost a Friend Monday, 16 March 09
Jacelyn • Filed under: Personal, Ranting • 10:20 pm
I never knew I had to blog about this. I never expect to have such a problem in my life. During all these years, I never had any major problems with any of my friends. I treat each and every one of them equally, I help them whenever I can, I listen to their problems and gave them advices now and then. I trust my friends, I love all my friends and I choose my friends wisely. I expect them to treat me the same way as I did to them.
The other day, one of my friends came over to my house and we had a good talk. She was complaining to me about the problems she had with her friends. I gave her advices and proudly told her I never had any problems with all my friends. She was quite surprised and I could see that she was green with envy.
Not anymore I supposed.
Today, I cried because of a friend. I cried for the whole two hours because of my stupid mistake. It was my fault initially, but I really didn’t expect things to turn out this way.
I knew she would be reading this and I really have to say, I AM SORRY. I am sorry for that message on Facebook. It was in a fit of anger. I truly apologize for it. But one thing I don’t understand is the stuff that you blogged about. I had to clarify:-
- I did not forgo the chance to go to Fahrenheit’s concert with you on purpose. I was down with a bad flu and fever and had MC for 2 days. I couldn’t even get off from my bed. I had already explained to you. Why do you have to say that I stood you up at the very last minute and bring this matter up? I even sold the ticket to your friend at a much cheaper price cos it’s YOUR friend. I really don’t get it.
- Someone else screwed up my entire day’s itinerary when I was supposed to go to your house for steamboat. I didn’t want this to happen either. Do you think I want it this way?
Other than these two occasions, I don’t think I had canceled any of the outings before. If I did, then I must have my reasons for it and I hope you understand.
But why do you have to say the other person deserved those tickets better?
Where am I during your birthday for the past few years? Do you know I ran all the way to the cake shop to buy your favorite cake?
Where am I when you need someone to host your blog? Do you know that I absorbed a portion of the charges that was supposed to pay to my host? For the three of you! Do you even know that?!
Where am I when your ex did horrible things? Where am I when you were down? I kept all your secrets for you. Did I share it with anybody else? No.
It’s not about forgetting or not having a good memory to remember what your friends like. It’s about the heart to. You like Winnie the Pooh, S.H.E., Fahrenheit, black, white, steamboat, etc. All these I know. Do you know mine?
I don’t know what else to say. I am extremely hurt. If you feel that I am not worth being your friend and failed as being one, I am alright with it. After all, I am the one who started kicking up a big fuss.
I know we will never be the same again.
hopefully they will not ruin this friendship over those matters. after all, friendships are hard to build and takes only few seconds to wreck everything up.
cheer up.
Well well, be it friendship, relationship, kinship etc.. we all need to balance by giving and taking… Guess it didnt work out for you and your friend. Fret not, because by losing something, u gain something as well, this is to balance things. You may realise what you gained much later but doesnt matter.
We all have to move on… sometimes, ppl say things without going through the thick skull of ours. And once the word is out, you can never take it back… sigh, what’s done is done sis. Cheer Up
Cheers,
Raymond
Things might not be the same but if you guys can take some time off to cool down and think about it, it will do both parties good.
Friendships, especially good ones are so hard to come by. If you guys really treasure it, things can be worked out. The relationship may be scarred but I like to think that having imperfection is the true test of relationships.
Good luck!
omg! dun tell me tat fren is someone i noe too? hmm… Cheer up! i’s sure things will get better soon!
ya lorx neighbour, i green colour lehx. Hahahaha. Piang you make me sound like very jia lat with my friends. Hahahahaha.
You will be okay with ur friend de. Just explain to her and let her know your feelings. Forgive and Forget. This is just a minor thing, don’t let this spoil ur friendship with her. I believe she treasure you the same as you treasure her.
Believe me, i am afterall someone who been through friendship wars. I am liao jiang le. Hahahaha.
This entry of yours has triggered many thoughts about friendships. I have had good friends whom i known for more than 10 years. Yes since primary school. And of all my birthday gathering or celebration for so many years, i hardly see them appear. Some GOOD friends indeed.
Anyway, i think you’re lucky. Don’t misunderstood me. I feel that at least your friend did bother to blog about some issues. This shows that she still cares about the friendship. And you still have a place in her heart. Well, i believe issues can be solved. You may not be as close or as good friends like before, but having a friend is much better than losing a friend.
Take care!